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HOW TO KNOW YOU’RE IN A HONG SANG-SOO FILM
Posted by Hayley Inch
Everyone you know is a former famous film director who is having a crisis over their work, or has retreated into academia.
Everything you say, no matter how innocuous, is misunderstood by your companions, resulting in constant arguments.
You’re trying FAR too hard to impress a girl you’ve only just met.
You have friends you only do one activity with: drink soju. Speaking of soju…
It’s always time for soju. Breakfast soju, lunch soju, middle of the night soju. SOJU.
You’re a filmmaking student torn between wanting to get back together with your ex, who also happens to be your professor, and a desire to start a new romance with a fellow student.
That girl you keep bumping into in a series of what feels like the same moment in time repeating DEFINITELY doesn’t like you as much as you think she does.
No one you encounter speaks the same first language as you do, but you all have imprecise proficiency in a second language resulting in constant misunderstandings.
You think a puffy winter jacket is appropriate attire in any given situation.
You have too many men interested in you, and they keep getting drunk and having FEELINGS at you. You don’t have time for this, you just want to finish writing your screenplay.
You mess up an opportunity with a potential paramour, but don’t worry – a time shift resets everything and gives you another chance to do things right.
An opportunity with a paramour went surprisingly well, but be wary – a time shift reset gives you the chance to experience all the ways the same encounter could have blown up in your face.
You frequent cafes and bars with impossibly poetic names.
You’re a lifeguard on a Korean beach and you keep running into different French women who are all called Anne, and all look like Isabelle Huppert.
You’re trying to have an important conversation with your ex-girlfriend, but filmmaking students recognise you as a famous director and insist on drinking with you.
You’re increasingly becoming paranoid that it’s the minute, mundane occurrences in life that are loaded with the most meaning, and that we don’t realise their importance until they’re gone.
Seriously, have you thought about soju?